Gloomhavenese

THOSE FORMERLY KNOWN AS MY FRIENDS

(ROLLOVER FOR BETTER PHOTOS, EVEN THOUGH THEY DON'T DESERVE IT)

Lane

DOESN'T LET

OTHERS DOWN

stephen

DIDN'T EVEN SEND A PHOTO LIKE I ASKED

Grant

SENT ME THIS PHOTO


(IT'S NOT HIM. I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE IT CAME FROM)

matt

ALSO DIDN'T EVEN

SEND A PHOTO

EXPOSITION INCITING INCIDENT CHARACTER BACKSTORY RISING ACTION COMPLICATIONS MORE RISING ACTION AND COMPLICATIONS CLIMAX FALLING ACTION DENOUEMENT
DR. GAMELOVE OR: HOW MY FRIENDS ABANDONED ME AND I ENDED UP MAKING A WEBSITE Seven days ago I (Lane) was driving to work. Game Brain crackled through the FM radio transmitter connected to my phone. Matthew announced the contest: SEND SOMETHING CREATIVE ABOUT WHO YOU GAME WITH. 
A seemingly innocuous announcement, sure, but with two big problems: Problem 1: I'm kind of an obsessive person (more on that later) Problem 2: $100 to spend on games is extremely tempting, time commitments be damned. I immediately reached out to my Gloomhaven game group with an idea. I was going to set up some cameras at our next game night to capture the comedy gold that comes out while we play. I mean, what better way to show how cool and funny we all are than some short video clips? 12 hours later, still no response from any of them. I'm on my own. Until suddenly, Grant decides to pull some Inception on me and sends a single text: "I'll program something for you." He really is a programmer, but it's a joke. He's showing his lack of interest by his unenthusiastic response. (He does back-end coding anyway, which is essentially useless.) But now the idea is planted. I could make a website where you can click on each member of our group and see videos of their funniest quotes from our game night... I know I'm all alone in this, so I get to work. I have no idea how to make a website, but that's not going to stop me. I find some Adobe Muse tutorials online, as well as a free template. ...The hours start wasting away... I finally have a semi-functional, (but pretty terrible) website. All I need now are the videos! Game night rolls around...! But Stephen can't play. I hate him for it. I ask if we should go on without him... but Matt is too loyal to let that happen. I now hate him too. Grant never responds to the texts... I hate him the most. My brilliant website idea will no longer have any videos on it. The whole reason for making it is now flushed down the toilet, but I'm in too deep. I've wasted too much work time. I have to finish... What started out as a comedy, ends up as a tragedy. What was once the hero's journey, is now the cautionary tale.

SOME FUN FACTS

EXPOSITION INCITING INCIDENT RISING ACTION CLIMAX DENOUEMENT

OUR ORIGINS

Lane and Stephen start playing some games together. Their wives play with them.

 

Grant finally graduates college and moves to be near his favorite brother Lane. Lane buys Gloomhaven to play with Grant and Stephen. Their wives no longer join them.

 

Matt hears how much fun they're having and decides to join.

 

Everybody betrays Lane and he has to make the website alone with no funny videos.

 

They never play Gloomhaven again (probably.)

 

OK FINE, MAYBE I DO STILL LIKE THEM

(BUT THIS SECTION IS LESS COOL WITH NO VIDEOS)

lane RUSSELL - tHE OBSESSIVE

- Signature catch phrase: "What day can we play this week?"

 

- The biggest board gamer in the group, and the only one who would consider listening to a podcast about games every week.

 

- Spends excessive time learning to use a laser cutter exclusively to make custom game organizers; learning about 3D modeling and printing simply to add game components; and learning how to make a website just to try and win this contest.

 

- The "Danny Ocean" of the group, but without any of the charm, wit, good looks, or infectious personality. Basically he just brought the group together.

stephen meek - tHE lifeblood

- Signature catch phrase: "And then I loot the coin." (He does it on purpose, just so we can't have it.)

 

- His passion and enthusiasm sustains the energy both in and out of game.

 

- Refuses to allow "asterisk" wins

 

- Has superhuman ability to keep his house immaculately clean and ready to game, despite having 3 kids.

 

- Wife thinks that he will probably one day run away with Lane. (She's right.)

Matt meese - tHE social gamer

- Signature catch phrase: laughing. All the time. Seriously, I think he only knows how to be happy.

 

- A crazy loyal person who would rather not play if another group member can't make it.

 

- Most important in-game strategy is quoting a movie at the optimal time.

 

- Lives in a perpetual state of expecting the game to suddenly betray him.

 

- Internet famous for playing the character Scott Sterling on Studio C. (Stephen was also a member of Studio C, but not everything is about him.

Grant russell - tHE A.P. King

- Signature catch phrase: "Wait, you're ready for the next round? I haven't even looked at my cards yet."

 

- Increases game night duration by an average of about 1 hour.

 

- Talented strategic gamer who can find winning strategies in any circumstance.

 

- Has been to Stephen's house almost every week for over a year, and has still never seen any of Stephen's three kids.

 

- Lane bought Gloomhaven ("a ridiculously expensive game" according to Lane's wife) just to spend more time with Grant.

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